History
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Vigilantes of Love History, Part 6
May 25, 2001
It's Jan of 1995...the Struggleville band has, for various reasons, some professional (lack of commercial success) and some personal (can't speak to those) broke up..
My version (and I'm sticking to it) is that I basically quit my own band...Newt Carter, David Labreye and Travis McNabb and I had given as much as any band could on it's first real national release...AAA radio was receptive to us...retail was not...Capricorn had no muscle to get records into stores...and it was a frequent phenomenon to be on the radio of major metro areas of the US and see no records for sale anywhere in sight...it was a situation repeated on every record we did for Capricorn.....you've all heard me speak of the "education" we received in this process about the politics of record distribution in this country...we learned fast, I guess...but not fast enough to escape the wounds and bruises that "inevitable toil without a purpose" leave...it left us (and me in particular) distrustful, stressed and at times arrogant...I think we quit before we hurt each other...Newt Carter and David Labreyre and Travis McNabb gave so much...I am sure I've only recently begun to see just how sacrificial their giving was...all I wanted, at the time, was some stability and some peace...it wasn't them completely (although I had real reasons)...it was the whole ball of wax I was failing to contend with...I never have felt protected in a lot of ways...
Funny thing is, it STILL feels and has ALWAYS felt, to be a venture without purpose...generally non-strategic...you began to feel that fate or fortune will never smile on you... Now, if you're smart you wake up to the fact that it's one's own narrow and limited blueprint you've been asking God to bless, like it was something you deserved... Much better to stuff it and better yet: throw it all away...and start to "take it as it comes"...making it up as one goes along is all we've ever been allowed to do...I think folks would do well to judge VOL's records with that in mind...a postcard on the journey...a "wish you were here" sorta endeavor...soon the records were to become simply auto-biographical...
And Blister Soul was a step in that direction...
Sooo, we learned to walk it off and shake off all that "biz" stuff....
Maybe the sooner artists awaken to that fact, the better off ( I believe) they'll be to really able to appreciate their own work (for the proper reasons), their gifts and talents...and even love and appreciate the people they will work with who are trying their own best, with what they have to offer, to take you to another level of success...
The state of the union at the time?
We had some good success with Struggleville...it was a storming record and a storming band...it took no prisoners...the industry noticed sort of...but grunge and all those other bastard sons of black Sabbath with their faux-angst were the kings of radio and kids and MTV...but even with Struggleville, there was the taste of something different coming from a different place...that was our style...a bit oversung perhaps ( I sang the whole s'ville record hoarse and strained)...but you learn as you go...everybody wants to be appreciated, successful, acclaimed, acknowledged.....a fewer number even wanna be rock stars...sometimes it's fans who want you to play the rock star...and when you don't comply, well, there's hell (or a facsimile) to pay.
Me?
I had no expectations to begin with...we were an Athens, Ga. band that kinda still thought it was "uncool" to have a deal at all...and we were skeptical of labels anyway (an assessment that has proven itself true over and over again)...of course I never felt we were owed anything in the divine justice sense...but I'll readily admit, on occasion, that I did wonder why there wasn't more room for a band such as ours and a writer such as myself to find a shred of stability....you know, like if there's Coke there's gotta be Pepsi...
We played out a few more shows...and then we parted company as a band in Nov. of 1994...
Chris Donahue had joined on bass....we started working with John Keane (REM, Widespread Panic, Cowboy Junkies, 10,000 Maniacs) on a record with just my new tunes, Chris...and a local drummer named Matt Donaldson...he was a local session fella...really solid....we never played 'live" together as a band...just the record... We did the record start to finish in 3 weeks...I threw out a tune...Chris and Matt found their parts...run it down...and then John hit "record." As simple as that...I never ceases to be amazed at the quality of musicianship on Chris' part..truely a phenomenal player...very creative (that's his guitar line on "Tempest"...ala Geo. Harrison!)
The tunes?
Blister Soul...my rip on Neil Young was showing through...I think the record sounds a bit more spanky/clean than I like things now...but it was a joy to make and an honor to work with John Keane..(.we live 5 houses apart)...a good neighbor!...that's a nice way to make an album...with your neighbor.
Blister Soul: It's still some folks' on this list's favorite record...it does have a message...it is heavy and fragile too...I'm not ashamed of any of it...it seems strong on many fronts...with good songs...strong playing...with enough character to make it credible...
Things I still notice:
I noticed there was a lot of attitude in the vocals...a sort of posturing and swagger...call it confidence...right there in the opening track, "blister soul"...and in "5 Miles"...the sort of thing that Dylan does well on "Hurricane", off Desire...It's that " let me tell you how it is, child" sorta delivery.....I call it swagger...and it comes outta the speakers in spades...5 miles outside Monroe? (a reference to the old space we use to rehearse in, in Gratis,Ga. at Lee Moody's barn)...and I know for a fact that the klan during that time was active in Walton County...so "5 miles outside Monroe" was a response to all the ya-hoo types that dwell in this region of ours who hide their racism behind rhetoric a some highly touted concept called "tradition"...I know there are some "differences of opinion" on this "sensitive" topic.....I don't get it..I'll just say it: There is such a thing as fighting and dying for the wrong cause...."Otis Redding's on the radio...he's always so lonely at the dock of the bay..." one of my favorite lines...and the track is aggressive and fast enough to hold the themes well...
"Skin" is a moment of heartache...John enlisted the talents of Andy Carson, who fiddled on this and "Unsuccessful." The song is tender and empathetic...told through the eyes of Van Gogh's brother, Theo...with that Gospel twist at the end...we all have a gift to use...I think crazy silence (something van Gogh loved) is an essential element...you have to get in touch with Him who made you to talk about you who are...
"Offer", an older tune that I had when I was in Cone Ponies...just an Americana Dylan-meets-the-Byrds sorta anthem...Madeira's B-3 organ is full and sweeping and works well on the track...
Balaam's Ass...a Sunday school song...that's newt Carter on electric guitar..pretty much "blows up"....more of that southern, street corner, wild-eyed preaching thang...sent this to Sesame Street for the counting section of the show...haven't ever heard back...
Bethlehem Steel...the hollowness of life's pleasure's and the joy we tend to live frequent denial of...perhaps a bit too heavy-handed in it's polemic...feels a bit grandiose...
Tempest...lovely, John really lovely...Chris Donohue delivered the neat Beatle-esque guitar motif...and now it's time for tea...of course it's about Brenda...this was to be a single that anybody could've gotten played...a "feel good hit of summer" (what is it like 2 minutes and 21 seconds?) Anyone except Capricorn...
Bolt Action...love it still, wicked guitars..a blueprint for other things...very raw... inspired (if I can use such a word in this horrific instance) by the bell tower sniper at Univ of TX. some years ago... I had played solo gig at a club on campus and stepped out to load my guitar aft the show...it was about 12midnight and there was this eerie mist hanging over the tress...and the promoter pointed up to the clock tower and said, "oh, that's where so-n-so shot everyone from..." I went back to the hotel and made a mental...and sonic note of it...
Parting Shot...still consider it to be one of my better ones...a parting shot is one offered in a spirit of cynicism...and a closing statement? usually a short speech full of conviction and nobility...if the shoe fits...the Debtor's Forge is not a real place...but I was driving through West Va. to do my first Mt Stages, solo, when I came up on these signs that showed were the old forges were...and the concept of refining metal stuck with me...very Old Test.
Certain Slant...mysterious...depressing...the raw nerves of life where God or friends seem to have left you alone to your own devices...the last line about "the tell me your deep dark secrets...and I'll tell you mine..." Well, I think that's about someone taking the huge risk of self-disclosure...and it later being used against them...the "oh, well nevermind" is a response from someone who promised a similar transparency...BUT then upon hearing the magnitude of the other's disclosure...changed the rules and backed out...but that hardly ever happens does it?
Unsuccessful....song about "pills" and what we swallow...Andy Carson's violin solo screams...same violin as on Skin...but this time it's run through a Marshall amp...one of the coolest moments...violin never ceases to move in terms of it's wide range of expressiveness...I love this song still ...classic...the last two lines still slay me: "you must learn to speak in hushed tones....when you're traveling around here..you must learn to read the warning signs...when the warning signs disappear..."
Blister Soul (reprise)...or slight return...the end of the concept record...which most of mine have been anyway...still beautiful to my ears after all these years...a "from the gutter" worship song:
why'd You give so much
why'd You give it all?
poured out on cold little misers
when the returns are so small?
oh, those strange economics
and the length that love goes...
oh...my....blister...soul....
done live...second take...
A lot of folks still list this as their fav VOL...I can see it, of course...I was getting use to the idea of being a bandleader...but I had nothing to offer....you had to just like the tunes and wanna tour...perhaps I should have just done solo tours at this point...there was no band...To tell the truth, the road version of this band was one of the least professional we'd ever had...we were OK...and there were some magic moments...but not great...it was becoming a labor of love for everyone...everyone had the best intentions, I'm sure...but for two years it translated into very little that would cause someone to leave home and play full time...so it was a lot of patchwork sort of "band-aiding"...many kind and loving friends of decent-to-mediocre abilities passed in and out of the touring band...we had some great moments though...what I've done has never been really complex or rocket science anyway....still, people were very hopeful for us...and kind to us...
Blister Soul: as far as the record went the songs felt solid, the passion was focused and the production tight and radio friendly (thank you John Keane!)....it feels like was a bit of a warm up in some ways....as a footnote, lack of decent distribution kept the record hard too find...although "Real Down Town" (our ode to the fickle little college scene that is Athens, Ga.) was all over AAA radio... On retrospective, "Blister" was a bit of a "lonely" record to make...(Chris left to break into Nashville CCM) Blister...it was some songs, some time, some tape...a sorting out of many emotions....an attempt to regain confidence and momentum...the touring band felt tossed together, the hurdles too high to clear...neither Fingerprint nor Capricorn had any strategy for developing VOL...as I said before, there never has been really...Another year followed of well intentioned, mind-numbing touring, with little results...I know poor Dan Russell at Fingerprint was terribly frustrated by the lack of commercial success...so by Slow Dark Train we were pretty beat up and demoralized...although I think a lot of folks were thinking we were on the verge of breaking...
After the Blister Soul tours I found that we had tried to please everyone we knew except ourselves...we found we had (more and more) been subconsciously setting our agendas to the drum-beat of illusionary superstructures known as "corporate rock and roll" and "modern rock radio."...and in the process our priorities and first love of simply making good music we liked for the honest joy it gave us...was becoming lost...
A ray of light...two dear friends came to help: For about 6 months, Chris Bland (bass, vocals), Tom Crea (drums) and I started to mold a different item...4 songs showed up on the VOL compilation record...it was noisy, brash (Hopeless Is As Hopeless Does, Drown, When I'm Broken)...and even tender (DoubleCure)...something changed...I still don't know exactly what it was...but it felt right...
And then a funny thing happened... One night, along some desolate road, in some back-country wasteland, we embraced all those incongruous, vain and empty promises from corporate-soul-sucking rock and roll (as it smiled and shook it's head)...and we gave it a big wet kiss...opened the van door...and kicked it out into the utter darkness...
I believe we were doing 90 mph...
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